Grandpa Tumblebug’s ‘Ode To The EPA’
February 17, 2008, 9:55pm
When my grandfather died in July 2006, I posted to Beltway Blogroll the ballad that he wrote years ago as a sarcastic tribute to the Environmental Protection Agency whose overbearing regulations helped run his family out of the oil and gas business in West Virginia.
Now that I don’t work at National Journal, I’m not sure how long Beltway Blogroll will remain online so I am reprinting the lyrics to “Ode To The EPA” here and uploading the audio for it. Enjoy. I know I will for years to come. Thanks, Grandpa Tumblebug.
Here’s the audio, followed by the lyrics:
When the EPA gets a hold on you,
they say, “Now, sir, this is what you’re gonna do!”
And when you get it done, they say, “This is not enough.”
Now we gotta change it, or they’ll slap a fine on us.
They closed up the steel mills, they shut down the mines;
now they’re working on oil and gas for a time.
If you wonder why the fall in our economic way,
you can put the blame completely on the EPA.
They tell us that Freon, which is heavier than air,
floats up to the ozone and makes a hole up there.
They try to tell us that the earth is warming up from this;
if it gets any warmer, we will all freeze to death.
[The following verse was added after the recording.]
Now chlorine is a chemical, that’s used everywhere,
From the kitchen to industry and chemical warfare.
It purifies our water and makes it safe to use,
Now the EPA thinks that’s gotta go, too.
The people of the USA should be aware
what the EPA is doing to our country fair
Now our jobs are gone and our factories are dead.
We have to buy our clothes from the Orient instead.
When our Congress set up the EPA,
they gave it the power to destroy USA.
What Hitler and Tojo couldn’t do across the tide,
now the EPA is doing inside.
Chorus
They say, “You gotta change this, you gotta change that.”
They make so many changes that I don’t know where I’m at.
They’re paddin’ up their bank accounts with our money
While they play a little game called their “job security.”
Categories: Podcast of the Week, Environment, EPA
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